"The Psychic Intuitor's Handbook"
Also Available on Amazon.com
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Understanding
Non-Verbal Communication
Understanding non-verbal
communications is essential to a successful reading by the psychic intuitor.
No matter what language, humans have woven the gestures they use into the
very fabric of our daily lives.
Everyone waves, points, and use their hands and bodies to communicate their
feelings. When we are arguing or
speaking animatedly, we express ourselves with gestures often unconsciously.
The sitter will tell the
intuitor much without ever opening their mouths. Using, understanding and
reading body language, gestures and sounds is not as difficult as it seems but
does require practice and observation.
Often, the sitter will give non-verbal clues that can give away their
feelings, no matter what they are saying.
If you think about it, we all use it every day.
The ability to recognize and use non-verbal communication is inborn to
humans.
Watch the interaction between a parent and child to see non-verbal communication
at its finest.
Mother:
“What’s wrong sweetheart? Does your
tummy hurt?”
Child: no
answer but looks sad.
Mother: “Do
you want to play with Freddie the Bear?”
Child: no
answer but eyes light up
Mother: “Here
you go.”
Child goes happily on its way.
Depending on the source, non-verbal communication makes up 70-90% of our
communication, often called the language
behind
the voice. Linguists
estimated that about 7% of the information communicated is from the words, and
tone, inflection and speed of the voice accounts for about 38% of information.
However, astoundingly, the remainder of the information, about 55%, comes
from body language and gestures.
Non-verbal communication is
important in many areas other than during a reading. In the case of
inter-personal relationships, understanding the other’s non-verbal communication
can help someone know what the person is thinking.
For example, if a wife tells her husband it is OK to go out with his
friends while she stays home watching TV, but she is standing there with her
arms folded with a sarcastic tone in her voice and
facing away from him, her non-verbal language clearly tells him she is
not happy.
Non-verbal communication is
also helpful in law enforcement. When the police question a subject, they
listen to the non-verbal communication to see if the suspect is lying or telling
the truth. In the business world,
the alert employer can learn about the interviewee by observing the gestures and
other non-verbal communication.
Watching for shifty eye movement or nervous gestures may tell the Human
Resources manager that the interviewee is telling not the truth.
Psychologists are trained to listen to non- verbal communication down to
the very slightest movement or gesture. Good poker players are keen on
non-verbal communication. They watch
the other players’ movements and facial expressions to determine what types of
cards other players are holding.
Things like looking at the cards often, pupil dilation and individual quirks tip
off the gambler to who may have the highest hand.
Not only must the psychic
intuitor be a good speaker and listener, the intuitor must be a
good observer. He must not only work
with the divination method, he must be aware of the reactions of the sitter to
his statements. Sometimes, this
seems like trying to pat your head while rubbing your belly.
However, this information is very important to the cold reader.
Posture, facial expressions, hand movements and voice modulation while
speaking, all tell something about the sitter.
The intuitor must watch the sitter to see how the statements fit.
If the body language indicates the reader is going down the wrong path,
he must notice this and switch direction to a more fruitful avenue.
There have been many books and
lectures written on body language.
All successful people read and use non-verbal clues in business, interactions
and everyday life but most are unaware that they using it.
To become a good intuitor, the intuitor should investigate the plethora
of information on non-verbal communication.
The intuitor must understand the basics of
this “behind the voice” area. To
deal with this topic in total would be a monumental task is itself.
This book will concentrate on the areas that are most applicable to
becoming a psychic intuitor.
There are some key first steps in learning and understanding non-verbal
communication. The first is that you
must always remember to interpret the non-verbal clues in context.
As you read the nonverbal language of the person, you must remember to
place the interpretation of it in the context of the conversation or situation.
When interpreting body language, each movement has a meaning.
However, be wary, one must not read the movement solely on its own.
Body movements are like sentences, to be meaningful they must be observed
in groups. Trying to interrupt a
single movement is like trying to understand the meaning of a word without the
sentence around it. The sentence and
paragraph provides a greater meaning to the word than the word standing alone.
The same with reading body movements.
A movement or a group of movements may mean different things in different
situations.
An example of body language that could be misread is a person crossing their
arms. Alone, it could mean
disinterest or confrontation. The
combination of the crossed arms and the body shivering would indicate the person
is cold and trying to warm him or herself.
However, in context, if the person was in a suitably warm environment
with their arms crossed and shivering, it could mean they are frightened.
But if you add one more “word” to the “sentence” of body language, a
flushed red skin, then the person may be sick with a fever.
The second key to understanding non-verbal communication is to look for
consistency. In order to truly
observe the non-verbal clues, all other nonverbal clues he sitter is presenting
must be consistent. If someone's
words do not match their non-verbal behaviors, this should be a sign to pay more
attention and try to decode the incongruent behavior.
As a whole, the words and the non-verbal gestures present in the message
must be consistent. If not, the
sitter saying something they may not truly mean or is trying to cover up
something, conscious or not. If the
sitter is slowly moving their head side-to-side and saying, “Yes, I see that”
clearly this is an obvious example non-consistent behavior.
The intuitor should notice an inconsistency like this and quickly reverse
the statement or move on.
The intuitor must also be careful that his nonverbal language matches the words
he is presenting. Research has shown
that when someone’s words do not match the non-verbal gestures, the listener
will ignore the verbal portion and focus on the non-verbal expressions.
Remember that both types of communication, verbal and non-verbal, must
work together to convey the proper message during a reading.
The intuitor will improve the reading when the spoken communication and
the non-verbal signals and gestures are coordinated, reinforcing and supporting
what is being saying.
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